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Can Being Too Caring Lead to Burnout?

A woman sitting indoors with her eyes closed, holding her head and appearing stressed, overwhelmed and emotionally exhausted.

Sometimes the people who are always there for everyone else can forget to check in with themselves.


They're the ones checking in on everyone, noticing when someone isn't themselves, listening to problems and trying to hold everything together.


I know because I was that leader. Could that be you?


When I was a deputy head, I prided myself on being the person staff could come to. I was always listening, always available. But I never really stopped to think about what that was costing me. I'd leave difficult conversations carrying somebody else's worry home with me and over time it all added up.


I didn't know then that there was a name for it: compassion fatigue.


I think many school and nursery leaders will recognise this. We spend so much time meeting everyone else's needs that our own slowly move to the bottom of the list.


The answer isn't to become less caring. It's about finding a way to care without completely draining yourself.


Sometimes that means setting a boundary. Sometimes it's noticing that your patience is disappearing or that you're feeling constantly overwhelmed. And sometimes it's simply giving yourself the same understanding you'd give to someone in your team.


If this could be you, or someone you know, please don’t skip over this.


Can you take a moment. Just a few breaths to consider if this might be you. The reason I feel so strongly about this is because that was me and I didn't notice. I didn't pause long enough to see what was happening to me, so I crashed. Yes. I became really ill, and I don't want that to happen to you.


Is it possible that caring for everyone else is starting to affect you? If so, now is the moment to take action. Action for yourself. This can mean starting with small and intentional steps, not anything huge….small steps is easier and more sustainable!



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